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Nip or Build a Relationship at Work?

By SiliconIndia   |   Monday, February 25, 2013
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Bangalore: We are often strictly discouraged not to develop relationships with the opposite sex at workplaces. But could curbing natural human tendencies spoil your chance at meeting the love of your life? Displaying affection at workplaces is obviously taking it too far. And most women feel uncomfortable at the thought of dating a colleague. So how should you deal with the attraction vibes you may feel with a male colleague at office? Here are a few suggestions compiled by The Levo League via Huffingtonpost.com to help you out will all the confusion that you may encounter.



What Do You Do?



To begin with, know that dating a colleague isn’t crossing the limits. Considering you spend the larger portion of your day at work (eight-twelve hours), where else are you going to be exposed to people?



"You don't have to avoid it, but you have to be smart about it," notes Chris Brya, who along with Miguel Almaraz co-authored a book entitled, WTF Are Men Thinking? "You have to be professional about this in the workplace and not be too vocal about it, because if it works out, great, but if it doesn't, things could go horribly wrong, which is why both people need to be on the same page about what that means and how they act with each other at work."



Miguel offers another interesting pointer on inter-office relationship advice: "Think about it from a worst-case scenario," he writes. "What is the worst possible outcome for this, and based on that, are you willing to deal with those consequences in the workplace? Because if you're not, then you really need to assess whether or not it's worth moving forward with that relationship."



It's not viewing the matter from a pessimistic angle, he adds, but a one to consider for all the right reasons. "It's a difficult piece of advice, but you have to really be rational because the hardest part is being rational when emotions are so heavily involved."



Don’t forget that all this discretion applies outside the work environment, as well. "Think about it: Linkedin can connect to your Twitter feed, so if someone is talking about a relationship online, it goes beyond the workplace, so really minimizing what you talk about and what you admit to is key," says Chris.

And What if That Relationship Lands on The Rocks?

And so what if things go downhill in the relationship? Well, this is where that above advice comes in handy.



"You broke up -- thank goodness you didn't tell anybody!"  exclaims Sherrie Schneider, the feminist co-author of “The Rules” relationship advice series. Now, you just got to  "Go to work, do a good job," she suggests. "Don't walk by his desk anymore, pretend he doesn't exist."



Sounds a bit too hard to follow? Not really, Sherrie says. "You're a creature unlike any other and you value yourself enough where if someone else doesn't value you -- for a day, a minute, for a fraction of a second -- then you're done," she says. "If you have to call in sick for a day and pretend you have the flu, that's fine, but you gotta move on."



Regardless of the result of any move you take in dating a coworker, Sherrie lays an emphasis upon remembering why you're in the workplace to begin with: "You're really there to work," she adds, "and you're really there to do a good job."


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